Toastmasters International -Dance Into the Future With Anne Bonney

Have you ever wrestled with a decision, only to freeze because your head is flooded with doubt, leaving you torn between the safe choice and the untried option? That’s because your brain is talking, trying to save you from one of life’s biggest risks—change.

Give those doubts some “sassy backtalk,” says Anne Bonney, a National Speakers Association’s Certified Speaking Professional, TEDx speaker, author, and expert in change management, who will give the keynote address at the 2025 International Convention in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania.

In her speech, “Ignite Your Next Move: Courageously Dancing Into the Future,” Bonney will share strategies that support her fervent belief that anyone, with a bit of bravery and an open mind, can master the challenges of change.

Bonney is an optimist, realist, and humorist who welcomes change as a lifelong growth opportunity, not a place to fear or be trapped in. When you hear her colorful stories, you’ll realize it can even be funny. It starts with some intentional brain talk on your part, she notes.

Bonney advises that you say, Hey brain, I got this, while reminding yourself of all the things you’ve overcome, figured out, and achieved in the past. “The ability to intentionally hit that voice of doubt with a little sassy backtalk is one of the abilities that builds mental toughness.” That toughness—which Bonney defines as a mix of resilience and confidence—is key to successful change.

Getting there takes grit. It calls for intentionally seeking unknown possibilities. When facing a problem, always ask yourself, How else could I solve this? It’s likely to feel scary at first, which is why Bonney calls it “dancing with discomfort.” Yet the more you practice, the more confident you’ll become at fielding life’s curveballs.

Listen to The Toastmasters Podcast to hear more from Anne Bonney.

A Lifelong Dance

Bonney began her own dance—with at least some discomfort—when she was 8 years old, and her family moved from the U.S. to Saudi Arabia (and later Egypt and Greece) for her father’s job. It was a whole new world, but Bonney was a bit of an adventurer and made friends easily. Her life was full of wonderful, healthy, safe change, which prepared her for a life of it, she says.

She happily learned to travel solo by bus in Athens, bargain with street vendors, and test her local language skills. It was exciting when her family hiked Nepal on vacation, rather than take the traditional trip to Disneyland that many American kids might prefer. “Nepal was closer—and cheaper!” Bonney laughs.

As Bonney grew older, her lively personality, easy congeniality, and love of performance brought opportunities to burnish the skills that eventually made her a dynamic communicator and public speaker.

“I grew up performing,” she says. “I was a singer, I was in all the shows. That gave me a ton of stage time and feedback.” She graduated from Interlochen Arts Academy, a performing arts high school in Michigan that has produced some notable names. The 1990s pop star Jewel was in her dance class. Bonney studied piano and opera. On campus, she was a ready participant in flash mobs (before they were cool, she laughs) and random performances.

The image shows a woman posing with a sea lion. The woman is smiling and appears to be interacting with the sea lion, which is the focus of the image.

On the Move

After graduating from college, Bonney became an elementary school teacher for children with special needs. Again, her adaptability and ability to relate to others, often in uncomfortable situations, were essential to her work.

However, after a time, Bonney’s broad interests and desire for a multi-faceted career led her to leave teaching. She had five more careers, including corporate marketing and animal training. Working with sea lions, seals, and birds of prey was “one of the most fun jobs I ever had,” she says, even though as a trainer-entertainer, it was often tough to compete with the charm of her fellow performers.

Fast forward to today: Bonney has lived through 27 moves, attended 13 different schools, lived on four continents, and pursued diverse careers. She has run marathons on every continent and joined morale-building visits to U.S. troops in Iraq when she was a brand manager for an athletic gear company.

Bonney is a former Toastmaster and Rotarian. She says in fall of 2013, she walked into her first Toastmasters meeting because she was thinking of becoming a professional speaker. "Of course Toastmasters was the perfect place to start," Bonney explains. She was a member for about two years, overlapping with her Rotary membership.

“It’s a big Bonney family thing,” she says of following her grandfather, father, aunt, and uncle into Rotary.

While no longer a member, she’s still active on the board of the Warm Hearts Foundation, a nonprofit that partners with several Rotary clubs on international humanitarian projects. She’s also involved with Rotary District 6290’s Life Leadership Conference, a youth leadership program the district (which spans part of Michigan and some of Ontario, Canada) has held for 75 years.

Why Change Is So Hard

Bonney has been living and thriving in change for so long she’s “pretty comfortable” with the unexpected. She loves sharing with audiences what she’s learned over the years—the power of action over fear and doubt. The satisfaction of overriding the risk-averse brain and growing mentally stronger and more confident.

But she knows it’s not easy.

“Change is hard because our brains like familiarity. If you’re facing a problem, your brain will throw out a quick solution,” she says. You might also welcome a quick fix but “that’s not how life works.”

She continues, “It’s the hardest thing about being human—we never know if what we’re about to do is the right move. But if we’re not moving, we’re not learning anything. There’s power in action and feeling okay with discomfort. We might try something and if it doesn’t work, we’ll try something else. Taking that risk of action is what builds the mental toughness that allows us to persevere through routine change or when we’re ‘ankle-deep’ in dilemma.”

Consider alternative ways of dealing with challenges. Bonney explains: “If you stick to your old way of dealing with things—your habits—you’ll often miss important details. Pause in the discomfort of uncertainty just long enough to consider multiple options.”

And lower your expectations when things don’t go exactly as planned. They rarely do, so if you expect the unexpected, you’ll have a much less terrible experience, she adds. “Loosen your grip on what you want and expect to happen.” Following Plans B, C, or even D might well have you saying, Oh, that wasn’t so bad. Or Oh, it worked! Or Best day ever!

Accepting the reality of temporary disruption relieves stress and keeps you going forward. This tactic works well, yet Bonney realizes it’s counterintuitive. “Lower your expectations?” she laughs. “Who tells you that?”

Don’t be afraid to challenge that discouraging inner voice. In fact, Bonney says she learned one of her most important lessons about negative self-talk from a fellow athlete. This seven-time competitor in the Double Ironman—an ultra-distance triathlon—had mastered supportive self-talk, while shutting out the alarm bells his brain was constantly clanging during grueling physical effort.

“He taught me to talk to myself, rather than listen to myself,” Bonney explains.

The good news is that challenging that voice—and moving from change discomfort to comfort—doesn’t require big steps. Even the smallest, low-stakes efforts can steadily build self-confidence and a mindset that’s motivated to action. Bonney shares succinct tips on how to do this in her two books, Get Over It! and Get Them Over It!

“Try a different dish at dinner, take a new route home from work. Take a meeting role, speak in your club, run for an officer position,” she advises. Meet new people, read a book on a unique topic and learn that you unexpectedly liked it, invite a new friend to a new activity. The possibilities are endless, and the payoff is to co-exist in peace with change, aided by mental toughness and maybe some sassy backtalk.

As Bonney notes: “The Greek philosopher Heraclitus said, ‘The only constant in life is change.’ We may as well get good at it.”